You've been playing a lot of The Walking Dead, haven't you?
I enjoy being a father, definitely not perfect, but I'm trying. There are certainly some frustrating moments with my son. I relish the chance to relive childhood again through their eyes, to see life how they see it. I also love to provide opportunities/ experiences that I never had. That's not really happening at the moment with my financial setbacks, but maybe soon.
Foolz said:You've been playing a lot of The Walking Dead, haven't you?
This may be my paranoia, but I find myself thinking of INSANE scenarios at times. What would we do if stranded, if there was an invasion, etc.
Premise 1: Maximum amount of happiness
1) The goal in life is to maximize your own happiness
2) People you love bring you increased happiness
3) Statistically, most parents love their children
4) Ergo you should have children
Premise 2: Sustained happiness
1) The goal in life is to be happy on a sustained basis
2) You are happy as is
3) Your life will not change substantially over time
4) Your happiness will not change substantially over time
5) Children will change your life substantially
6) Change in your life may disrupt happiness
7) Ergo you should not have children
I'll leave it to the parents here to provide you the emotional side.
---
Tell me to get back to rewriting this site so it's not horrible on mobile
I'd never tell someone to have kids because, despite our biology, not everyone was meant to have kids. But from my perspective I love being a father... at least 6 out of 7 days of the week. At times they'll make you feel happier than you've ever been, and at other times they'll frustrate you like nothing else.
So what do I get out of it? At times not a damned thing other than a headache or ulcer (particularly those teenage years). But at other times you've got someone who loves you unconditionally and a source of immense pride (the boy just got put into his school's gifted program last week - BOOYAH!). I have a 23 year old step-daughter now who I raised since she was 12 and between her and her youngster sister and brother I've pretty much seen how it all progresses. Seeing how she's turned out does make me feel remarkably proud and puts all the sacrifice and frustration you have to endure at times into perspective.
It's absolutely worth it. And absolutely worth avoiding it if you don't really feel like it's your thing.
Yodariquo said:Obviously I don't have kids, but I am an expert in logical deduction. Allow me to provide you two different logical conclusions based on different premises
Premise 1: Maximum amount of happiness
1) The goal in life is to maximize your own happiness
2) People you love bring you increased happiness
3) Statistically, most parents love their children
4) Ergo you should have children
Premise 2: Sustained happiness
1) The goal in life is to be happy on a sustained basis
2) You are happy as is
3) Your life will not change substantially over time
4) Your happiness will not change substantially over time
5) Children will change your life substantially
6) Change in your life may disrupt happiness
7) Ergo you should not have children
I'll leave it to the parents here to provide you the emotional side.
This is amazing and it should be in some guidebook on whether or not one should have children.
From an uncles perspective I've found it quite fun in spurts but also far too demanding for me. You basically become a baby butler till they can use the toilet and feed themselves. Then your life totally changes, you have no free time and you do kid things, not adult things you used to do.
SteelAttack said:It's absolutely worth it. And absolutely worth avoiding it if you don't really feel like it's your thing.
Agreed. I'll add that you should never have kids unless you are 100% committed. I've known several people who are too self absorbed and should have never had children. One of those people has three. The children always suffer.
Like GG I enjoy children from the perspective of being an uncle but I also enjoy being able to just get up and go when I've had enough.
___
Listen to Wu-Tang and watch Kung-Fu
Yoda's second argument wins, better to have the happiness now rather than risk it on prospective benefit.
bugsonglass said:Like GG I enjoy children from the perspective of being an uncle but I also enjoy being able to just get up and go when I've had enough.
Hell yeah to that. My little-est nephew decided to treat a home store like a soft play today and smashed a very large 4 ft high vase. I got angry stares and a stern telling off by a store clerk. If they'd made me pay for it that little sucker would be on a leash in public.
I have no plans on it personally but props to those who have the balls and the means to be a parent.
An idea might also be to adopt. I'm probably not in a position to speak but it seems to me like less of a self-serving act than procreating. It is a great thing to give a chance to someone (or more) who would otherwise have had none simply by virtue of being born in a shitty situation.
___
Listen to Wu-Tang and watch Kung-Fu
---
Tell me to get back to rewriting this site so it's not horrible on mobile
---
Tell me to get back to rewriting this site so it's not horrible on mobileAny Disney gif is gonna get a plus from me.
You should raise an army of children and work them hard on the farm. Just like Harvest Moon.
I've been in a stable relationship now for 15 years, so it's not like at this point either of us is going anywhere, which is fine by me. In fact, despite some set-backs here and there I really enojy my life more every year.
I've never had a desire to have children, ever. To this day. In fact, all teh reasons not to have children spring to mind and I can;t really come up with a single reason to have them, other than to pass on this piece of land I have put so much time into. But most likely they'll just sell it and spend the money on helicopters and dune buggies.
So, those of you who do have kids. Worth it? Avoid it? Or if you want to go deeper, what do you get out of having mini-me's around?