Starting on GameSpot way back in 2006, I started in the blog scene as a means of being more free and open with opinions and feelings.  This is one aspect that has been successful in conditioning myself.

From that, I don't particularly like having anything to hide so it's time to bring everyone up-to-speed on where I am.

In late last August I visited the health services provided by the University due to decreasing mood, sporadic and significant mood swings particularly downward, and to verify my health is continuing fine having started living on my own.

Physically I got a clean bill aside from being a bit low in Vitamin D, but mentally, after being bounced around between two MDs, a counsellor, psychiatrist and psychologist, the conclusion has been moderate depression.

Go crazy?  DON'T MIND IF I DO!

Not exactly the most shocking result, all things considered.  For the most part, it's been an ongoing issue now for about five years, but never had anything done until now.  My last visit to the doctor was about a year-and-a-half ago about fatigue, and all I got there was that I was perfectly fine and to maybe get some exercise.

I guess I don't really have a point.  That's just where I am.  The psychiatrist recommended SSRI medications, but my aversion was too strong to accept the advice of someone who obviously knew much better about what the best option was.  Rather, I merely have weekly sessions through the University's psychological services.

On the plus side, they all seemed confused that there was no effect on my appetite and that there wasn't any weight gain.  Apparently that's very common.  So at the very least I know that I truly am immune to weight gain.
Posted by Ellyoda Sun, 21 Nov 2010 21:30:29 (comments: 50)
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Sat, 04 Dec 2010 02:23:42
bugsonglass said:

so fuckin' funny.  

can't wait for gg to see all this awesomeness!!!

bugsonglass said:

Don't know what to say.  I'm still hurting really bad and feel emotionally stagnant.  Hope you don't go through the same agony




I have a saying: Advice is like Cock. Don't try to give it to someone who doesn't want to take it.

My advice giving days are mostly behind me now...

All I hope for now is to try and get a smile out of people whenever I can.

For you to say what you said in my Cock Out topic, when you say how you are feeling in THIS topic... It makes me glad I made you laugh.

I only wish I could do the same for Yoda every once in a while.



 
Sat, 04 Dec 2010 10:36:26
phantom_leo said:





          I have a saying: Advice is like Cock. Don't try to give it to someone who doesn't want to take it.

My advice giving days are mostly behind me now...

All I hope for now is to try and get a smile out of people whenever I can.

For you to say what you said in my Cock Out topic, when you say how you are feeling in THIS topic... It makes me glad I made you laugh.

I only wish I could do the same for Yoda every once in a while.


You have a certain gift, I mean this sincerely.  It's something very uncommon.  Charlie Chaplin had the same gift.

Smile (though your heart is breaking)  (for the images)

Smile (though your heart is breaking)  (for the better version of the song)

 
Sat, 04 Dec 2010 23:14:50
phantom_leo said:

I have a saying: Advice is like Cock. Don't try to give it to someone who doesn't want to take it.

My advice giving days are mostly behind me now...

All I hope for now is to try and get a smile out of people whenever I can.

For you to say what you said in my Cock Out topic, when you say how you are feeling in THIS topic... It makes me glad I made you laugh.

I only wish I could do the same for Yoda every once in a while.

I cannot properly express profound effect you and everyone here have had.  My messing around in the pre-VGP days helped me self-learn web security.  Building this site held my interest in programming through the rough patches and provided motivation to keep going, and the experience there has led to my current successful employment.  The podcast has greatly improved my casual speaking.

But far more than that is that it's a reason to get up in the morning.  To never give up.  And to feel at home nomatter where I am.  I have had a terrible week, and I can't say I've ever felt worse, regardless of whether that's a disproportionate response, but that ends now.  Thank you.  You've done far more than give me a chuckle; you've given me hope.

 
Sat, 04 Dec 2010 23:34:08

 
Sun, 05 Dec 2010 00:39:37

NUDE PILE ON!

 
Sun, 05 Dec 2010 00:41:15

YAY!

 
Sun, 05 Dec 2010 03:48:50

Just don't forget your Cock Out controllers!

 
Sun, 05 Dec 2010 04:51:44
So you can follow along on my rollercoaster, tonight we had a bowling outing for everyone at work at the university (end of semester), so I managed to find myself out of the apartment for something other than work or school for once and managed to feel human again for the first time in a long time.  I think that started here.  I can't say I'm perfect by any stretch, but I smiled today, and that's a start.
 
Sun, 05 Dec 2010 04:54:23



 
Sun, 05 Dec 2010 06:29:56

Good stuff Yoda. Happy


An added bonus is that bowling itself is awesome fun!

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