I waited a while to post this tale because I wanted to confirm from former coworkers that what I thought had happed, really happened.  It's not about me, but about a girl that I worked with. It's about a robbery gone wrong, in one of the funniest ways possible.  There's also a little bit of a redemption in here for the would be robber.

  The coworker who was involved is named Donna.  I worked with her over a decade , while just starting out in my teaching career.  I'd work weekends, to give me and the wife some spending money, and Donna worked mostly second shift.  Donna was very friendly and sweet.  Everybody seemed to love her, but most considered her to be a bit of a pushover.

  One night,about ten o'clock,  Donna was on the clock in an empty store.  One of the regulars came in, but the thing is he came in high as a kite with his shorts covering his face and a knife in his hand.  He demanded that Donna give him all of the money in the register drawer.

  Now Donna did what most of us would do, she panicked.  Of course, we all panic in different ways, some cry, some freeze in terror.  Donna, on the other hand, started laughing uncontrollably.  She giggled like a little girl and could not stop.  This confused the robber, who thought she was laughing because she recognized him, but she did not.  He then took the shorts off of his face and pretended like it was just some cruel joke.

"Oh, I was just kidding.  It's me, it's me! "  he said.

  He then took off in his work van, with his name and phone number on the side. Donna called the cops after she got got over her giggles and the would be robber served about three years in prison.

There were plenty of laughs about that, as dangerous as the situation could have been.  The story made the papers, and even rumors that some radio shows picked up on it.

  Now that was years ago and I have not seen Donna in quite some time.  I heard from people that kept up that there was a lot of turmoil in her home.  Husband left her, children always in trouble.

  But the best part is the would be robber (I'll just call him Jack), seems to have turned his life around.  He's become a handyman of sorts, painting buildings, repairing lawnmowers, doing construction on the side.  I've talked to Jack since and he seems like a pretty good guy.  If I'm working, he'll always stop in to talk to me, ask about my uncle in the nursing home and go on back to work  At least he seems to have changed and is trying to do some good with his life.

Posted by travo Wed, 02 Apr 2014 14:43:18 (comments: 7)
 
Wed, 02 Apr 2014 14:48:50

Now Donna just needs to redeem herself as well.

 
Fri, 04 Apr 2014 17:15:54
I would have asked him: "Are you really going to rob me with shorts on your head?"

"Really?"
 
Sat, 05 Apr 2014 20:38:46

And don't forget his name painted on the side of his work van.

 
Sun, 06 Apr 2014 13:58:38

A fine tale of criminal intrigue, danger, humor, despair, and redemption. Truly this was one death away from being the Song of Fire and Ice of gas station stories.

 
Sun, 06 Apr 2014 15:10:34

Well, if you want that final push that makes it like ASoIaF, then here goes. I knew Donna's oldest son was doing well for himself, got married, moved to Greenville(plug for Robio).  What I found out through a friend is that he lost his job and they moved back in with Donna and her husband.  Rumor has it that his wife and Donna's husband got together, moved out and are now living together.

 
Sun, 06 Apr 2014 15:40:58
Ahhhh incest or at least something close. Sure that works for me.

Oh and while I appreciate the shout out, I lay no claim to Greenville despite being born there.
 
Mon, 07 Apr 2014 03:21:25
travo said:

Well, if you want that final push that makes it like ASoIaF, then here goes. I knew Donna's oldest son was doing well for himself, got married, moved to Greenville(plug for Robio).  What I found out through a friend is that he lost his job and they moved back in with Donna and her husband.  Rumor has it that his wife and Donna's husband got together, moved out and are now living together.

That prose is a bit too advanced to be taken seriously as an appropriation of Game of Thrones.

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